At the Heart of It

I'm always listening... to authors on tape, to friends, to family, to the many voices in my own head. It can be a bit overwhelming. Would I listen to a mentor if one presented? I have learned through tough lessons that my only best teacher is right inside this heart of mine. Each well meaning guide brings their own perspective, their own limitation and fear. The best sort of mentor is one that shows by example, that mirrors and points to available moments of awareness without judgement or fixing.

This is the reason I am drawn to the Courage & Renewal program. The touchstones are close to most authentic for me. There are great things in the Course in Miracles and I'm currently listening to Spirit Junkie by Gabrielle Bernstein... I also resonate with Conversations with God and Mike Dooley's flamboyant persona... Louise Hay's solid wisdom, Deepak, the list goes on and on. I'm sober three years today. I've woken up and grown up so much in three years. I'm floating around in limbo right now somewhat serenely. I am my own heroine and lover and mother and father. I am the witness to the beauty and the pain, the breezes and drama, the joy and love, the anger and judgement... I am just watching all of this and wondering still what part I may choose to play and to what purpose.

So I suppose at the heart of it I am surrendering & listening still with wonder. 

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