Day 2 on 02-02-2022

I'm enamored with numbers. I'm not into numerology but I just like numbers. My sober date is 04-14-14, I dig that! Other people can't care less, I get it. Anyway. I'm not posting this to general Facebook any longer just to the writing group for the Hay House Challenge.

I have 20 minutes to pound this out. I realized that yesterday I could have put a tidy bow on the article by ending with something brilliant about going to any lengths... full circle and all that. Oh well. I realized after I recorded the session that my focus on food is possibly the problem, period. I spoke to a wise woman that I know and I've been listening to my intuition about things... (the Unity focus, internal harmony) and what's showing up is an easy path to consistent exercise. 

For decades, literally, not exaggerating, I tried to stop smoking and stop drinking AT THE SAME TIME. I was convinced it would only happen that way. I was clearly completely delusional. It really stopped me from success on either front. I spun out for years trying and trying and failing and failing to do do either or both at all for more than a week or two. 

Last night in day 2 of the HH Challenge they suggested writing every day. I'll be doing that here, They also suggested NOT editing. Yikes... stream of consciousness can be crazy. One year from today I should have enough for a book. I already have enough for a book! I need an outline.

Back to the main line train of thought here. I finally realized or was forced to acknowledge the greater of the two addictions or I would have lost everything. Alcohol yanked my chain and dragged me down farther and faster than cigarettes ever could. So, Reality stepped in and my decades long internal wrestling match was decided. 

I'm getting that sense now, here, in this match between food and fitness. I've focused on food, mostly, like I did yesterday listing out all the diets and not even mentioning all the exercise shit I have also tried along the way. Food is easier. It doesn't make your muscles ache and your every movement painful for a while. I'm saying this now after just a quick introduction video to the 21 Day Fix program on Beach Body. I signed up for the whole year of unlimited streaming videos. I was absolutely thrilled to realize yesterday that I can view the videos on my Roku TV upstairs and I don't have to squint at my iPad or Chromebook screens! What's coming through loud and clear is that I want to FEEL good, physically, I want to have energy and freedom of movement. I want to feel confident and look good to myself for myself. Food is a big part and I'm noticing that the workout portion will be even bigger.

Once upon a time in a land far away I worked out daily and completed a Beach Body program called Slim in Six. I turned 40 that year and it was the best shape I had ever been in. I moved and worked and wasn't able to maintain it for the long term but it still sticks in my mind that I can and did accomplish it and it felt great. Why not re-create that experience right now? I have the time and the means to do it! So, there it is. I'm off to the races, writing, working out and eating within a set of guidelines. It's about time my Vision boards be realized! Your timing not mine!

Oh... wrapping up, going to any lengths for me right now is to be willing to be safe and careful with my body in the workouts and be SORE and do whatever I need to to take good care of myself so that I can continue at a steady pace. Little by slowly I will arrive healthy, wealthy and wise!

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